Jul 31, 2011

The foot in mouth disease cure

I have been known to say something that makes the people around me blush because of what I have just said.  I then realize when I see the horrified look that I have just said something that wasn't politically correct.

For some reason, I have started thinking before I say something horrific.  Let me give you an example.  This past month I was going grocery shopping then went to pay for it (aren't you glad I am one of those honest people that pay for my food?).  I was in the aisle where the person in the front wasn't run up right, but I didn't want to change lanes because something would happen in the next aisle.  There were two men in front of me.  They probably didn't know each other and were paying separately.  I almost said, "This is the first time I have been shopping and ran into two men doing their own shopping."

I thought before I talked.  For those that don't know me, that is a monumental occasion for me.  I thought about all the reasons that could offend someone.  Perhaps they aren't married.  Perhaps they are married and their wife didn't want to go with them.  I should hear clapping for actually thinking.

Once at an adoption party, I told the host how lucky my mom was because she could have 6 children naturally.  (Horrified look on adoptive mom's face)

I once asked a woman how far along she was.  She wasn't pregnant (Never ask a woman how far along she is unless you see the baby crowning)

When I met my husband's ex-wife's second ex-husband's mother (if you follow that, you are officially a genius in my book)  I immediately asked her if her son had signed a prenuptial agreement.  I figured if he hadn't, he could at least get half of the money for the property my husband had paid for but couldn't get because he had signed a prenuptial agreement.  My husband, Mother-in-Law and the ex-husband mother were horrified.  (But everyone was curious)

So, if you suffer from foot-in-mouth disease, the only cure for it is to think before you talk.  Since that time in the grocery store, I have started thinking more.  I can't tell you what brought on the change, but it is a nice one. 


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